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Tomorrow Will Be Different
Tomorrow Will Be Different: Love, Loss, and the Fight for Trans Equality | Sarah McBride
A captivating memoir that will change the way we look at identity and equality in this country Before she became the first transgender person to speak at a national political convention in 2016 at the age of twenty-six, Sarah McBride struggled with the decision to come outnot just to her family but to the students of American University, where she was serving as student body president. Shed known she was a girl from her earliest memories, but it wasnt until the Facebook post announcing her truth went viral that she realized just how much impact her story could have on the country. Four years later, McBride was one of the nations most prominent transgender activists, walking the halls of the White House, advocating inclusive legislation, and addressing the country in the midst of a heated presidential election. She had also found her first love and future husband, Andy, a trans man and fellow activist, who complemented her in every way . . . until cancer tragically intervened. Informative, heartbreaking, and profoundly empowering, Tomorrow Will Be Different is McBrides story of love and loss and a powerful entry point into the LGBTQ communitys battle for equal rights and what it means to be openly transgender. From issues like bathroom access to health care to gender in America, McBride weaves the important political and cultural milestones into a personal journey that will open hearts and change minds. As McBride urges: We must never be a country that says theres only one way to love, only one way to look, and only one way to live. The fight for equality and freedom has only just begun.
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Scochrane26
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I don‘t usually post political news, but this is book-related & exciting. McBride may be our first transgender person in Congress! If you haven‘t read her memoir, you should. When I finished her book, I knew I needed to keep up with her career because she is capable of moving up the political ladder.

Singout Thanks for the reminder! Moving up on my TBR list! 2mo
marleed I usually keep my 5* reads, but after reading this several years ago I thought I could not keep. I placed it in an LFL hoping it would be found, read, and enlightening to someone else. 2mo
26 likes2 comments
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JenReadsAlot
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Pickpick

Great book!

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Kenyazero
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In celebration of the #TransRightsReadathon, I'm highlighting openly trans and nonbinary authors this week. Sarah McBride is a prominent trans rights activist, and her memoir hilights the trans rights movement and her own experiences with gender.

Please consider donating to organizations that support our trans and nonbinary communities, such as the Trans Health Legal Fund through Trans Law Center: https://transgenderlawcenter.org/thlf-donate

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BkClubCare
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Tomorrow Will Be Different #LGBTQ+
✈️ #flightreading #BookSpin

45 likes2 stack adds
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Scochrane26
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Pickpick

Listened to Sarah McBride‘s story all week. I had put this on my tbr a long time ago because I want to continue being educated about transgender issues. I think the first part dealing with her transition is very useful to parents/transgender children (and me as a therapist). The middle part about the loss of her husband was so sad. Of course, I had research her on wiki & found out she‘s now the 1st openly transgender state senator in the US. 👇

Scochrane26 She‘s only 31, I‘m sure we will be hearing more about her in politics in the future. #mistletoemaniacs 16 pts #winergames @Clwojick 3y
marleed This was my only 5* read that felt irresponsible for me to keep on my shelves (I love having a 5* collection). I had to put in an LFL in hopes someone would chance upon it and after reading it find themselves more compassionate about the transgender community. 3y
Scochrane26 @marleed That was a good idea. I borrowed from the library but have already recommended it to my therapist coworkers. 3y
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HeatherBookNerd
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Pickpick

A wonderful personal memoir that reflects the need for national protections for the transgender community. This would be a useful Trans 101 for folks that are not as familiar with the daily reality faced by trans people. Sarah is an accomplished, passionate, compassionate woman and has a gift for explaining public policy through the lens of personal experience.

marleed I keep my five star reads. But with this one I thought it irresponsible that it sat on my shelves seen only by me. So, I donated my copy to a LFL and it‘s my hope that action helped someone find a compassion they hadn‘t realized before reading the book. 3y
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JenReadsAlot
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Did a little 3 for 2 sale shopping on Audible!

Megabooks Adult Children is so good! It completely changed my outlook! 3y
JenReadsAlot @Megabooks I knew I could count on you for feedback with the nonfiction picks! 3y
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Amiable
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Since the cat has taken possession of the couch (and God forbid any humans deign to displace her 🐱😬), I‘m relegated to the chair. Good thing she‘s cute. 🙄

#summer2021 giveaway
Read in a comfy chair
@Lauram

Lauram I‘m in a similar situation at my house. I wouldn‘t have it any other way! 3y
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MallenNC
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Pickpick

I am so glad that our #SheSaid group read this one so I could take my time with it and discuss it with others. I love books that let me see into someone else‘s life. Readers learn a lot about Sarah McBride‘s life, especially her family relationships and her work for trans rights. (I‘m not sure if you can spoil a nonfiction book so I‘m being a bit vague). It‘s also a good book if you‘re interested in how politics and social justice efforts work.

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KathyWheeler
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Pickpick

This book was excellent and taught me a lot about the discrimination that trans people face. Sarah McBride has had a lot of support in her life, but she points out that she‘s been lucky — many trans people don‘t get the kind of support she‘s received. This book is a personal story, but she also writes about politics as well and it‘s not at all boring. #SheSaid

Riveted_Reader_Melissa I‘m so glad you caught up to us and enjoyed the reading… it definitely had more politics in it than I was expecting going in, but from her personal experiences it was also very interesting. 3y
KathyWheeler @Riveted_Reader_Melissa I‘m glad this book was picked for this read along; I‘m not sure I would have read it otherwise and I would have missed out on a good read. 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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Discussion Time #SheSaid!

This book went by way too fast, and there was a lot packed into what is still a young life, I hope we‘ll see much more from her going forward.

MallenNC I enjoyed getting to know Sarah McBride through this book. Of course the parts about Andy were so sad, but you can tell he still inspires her. I‘m also looking forward to seeing what else she accomplishes as a state senator. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC Me too! And I was surprised how much I learned about legislating in this book too. I wasn‘t expecting that and it was very educational too….how the nitty gritty gets done, it‘s amazing we accomplish anything. 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC Hopefully….someday…she‘ll run for something Nationally. 3y
MallenNC @Riveted_Reader_Melissa I liked the legislative/lobbying process she included too. I like reading about politics but sometimes it gets too in the weeds. She did a good job keeping it interesting and relatable for an average reader. I hope she runs for higher office too. 3y
vlwelser She's amazing. Everyone should read this. Seeing things from her perspective was so interesting. I had the audiobook for the second half and actually hearing her voice may have made the book even better. And the stuff with Andy was so sad. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC Yes, I didn‘t realize how much politics was going to be included, and even though she kept it on target and to her life, it was very well done and I thought gave great insight to regular people who don‘t know how the process works how much goes into even the littlest things. Why nothing gets passed fast and simply. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser This is one that might be worth re-reading on audiobook, sometimes the memoirs read by their authors are just something special. 3y
vlwelser I would definitely recommend a reread with the audiobook. It really is lovely. 3y
MallenNC @vlwelser I didn‘t listen to this one but generally I do like memoirs when they‘re read by the author. It seems even more meaningful when you can hear the person saying the words. 3y
tenar Thank you to everyone who suggested and voted on this book! I hadn‘t heard of it and might not have picked it up, thinking it would be too sad. I‘m really glad I read it. I felt the same way about learning more than I expected to. After finishing it, I watched her speeches and interviews on Youtube and felt a lot of pride and joy knowing all the work she and Andy put in behind it all. I can‘t wait to see what she does next! 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar I‘m so glad you liked it! If nothing else, the recommendations that come with group picks puts great new books on all of our radars. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Just a side question, I‘m curious if someone else who is disabled related to it in a similar way….Trans is not a disability per say, but I found myself relating as a disabled person. Like someone who has a cleft pallet needs surgery to be not ostracized, people born Trans are born with the wrong body and require surgery to “fix” their outside to match their inside (if they so desire)… it‘s a stretch of a comparison, and I‘m sure would ⤵️ 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ offend many, but I found myself relating on that level. As someone, in my case born with a chronic illness, I didn‘t choose mine, and they didn‘t pick the wrong body, so why should anyone be looked down on for taking the medical technology available to be happier with themselves. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ I would never want it labeled as a “medical condition”, because I know many religious people would jump on that to “cure” people, like the horrible conversation therapies…but I found the discussions about access to medical care very reminiscent of things with the American with Disabilities Act…and probably Black Women, also chronically underserved by the medical community, might relate too. (edited) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa I think I related a lot when she briefly talked about her transition, and that surgeries denied the Trans community, are the same used for mastectomies, or reconstruction, but are denied because one is considered ok and the other not, which is all a value judgment that shouldn‘t be made by anyone but whoever‘s body it is. Definitely not by doctors, hospitals, insurance, or government. 3y
KathyWheeler I learned a lot from this book, and it was compulsively readable. As someone who‘s been through a cancer diagnosis (just nowhere near as serious), that part especially resonated with me. I cried at one point. I don‘t like to read about the political process, but I enjoyed these parts because they weren‘t so dense that I couldn‘t understand. I also loved how McBride humanized trans people because we often forget we‘re talking about real people. 3y
tenar @Riveted_Reader_Melissa Great questions, these topics are a spaghetti-noodle tangle in my brain! Yes, I could relate to the access needs, fears, and fights for appropriate care, and feeling like you‘re begging someone, often insurance, to decide you deserve something that could improve your quality of life. I was so touched by Andy‘s work because of that! And it‘s a tangle for me, as I was surprised I also could relate to Sarah‘s childhood. ⤵️ 3y
tenar ↪️ I fit into the non-binary category, though I “pass” as my assigned gender at birth and don‘t live “out”. For some reason, I thought that since I only have had a mild physical dysphoria, I wouldn‘t have so much in common with a trans woman‘s youth. But I did! And I think of my non-binary status as a condition of my body and mind, just like my illnesses and disabilities. They‘re not faults or choices, they‘re just conditions. ⤵️ 3y
tenar ↪️ If there is treatment available to improve my life, I deserve access to it, and, at the same time, there are so many conditions (even ones considered disabilities!) that don‘t need to be “fixed”. But I couldn‘t agree more, I think in the current climate, associating LGBTQ identities in any way with illness is not appropriate. (I‘ve been on the receiving end of ugly religious expression for both my sexuality and my illness.) There‘s an awful ⤵️ 3y
tenar ↪️ stigma around body conditions/disability/sickness, and trans people do not need any more stigma. But I dream of a future where that heath stigma is eradicated and the choice of medical treatment is available to all. Did that make any sense? It‘s nuanced, connected spaghetti to me.

(Side note, loved Sarah‘s constant remembrance of disability when discussing marginalized identities. It‘s so often forgotten. She‘s a gem and a great politician!)
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tenar @KathyWheeler I only have a chronic illness, and I cried during that part, too! I bet that was a truly emotional read for you. I felt the same way about how readable it was, and how she grounded everything so well in the real world experiences of herself and everyday people. I was especially moved by how she connected Andy‘s short life to the conviction that there‘s no time to wait when it comes to fighting for rights and acceptance. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KathyWheeler I cried there a bit too, I think it was so deeply touching and moving. And yes, @tenar I loved that part too, that touchstone, no one knows how long they might have so it‘s irresponsible to suggest they “wait their turn” to have full rights. (That part also reminded me of the Civil Rights struggle too.) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Yes, I loved that she referenced that a lot, because it often gets forgotten (handicapped/disabled access) or ignored. And yes, it‘s interconnected and confusing, I‘m glad you understand what I meant too…it‘s way to easy for groups seeking to harm/control to take anything and make it a “sickness” instead of a condition that requires real medical treatment. Living on that edge, appearing normal/passing for healthy, has always been an eye⤵️ (edited) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ opening experience for me. If I‘m getting around well that day, I must be lazy other times or putting it on, if I‘m getting around poorly, I must be faking it for attention, or perceived as drunk or drugged. Humans and assumptions and how you get treated because of them has always been a mixed bag, but in many ways seeing those shifts has made it easier to understand other issues/ -isms with similar perception shifts, at least for me. (edited) 3y
KathyWheeler @tenar I absolutely loved that part too! Why should people have to stand around and wait until society decides they deserve equal rights? They may never live to see it. (edited) 3y
tenar @Riveted_Reader_Melissa Yes, yes, me too! I also pass as able-bodied whenever I‘m not using my wheelchair, and seeing people treat and judge me differently on different days has been eye-opening. I agree, it‘s given me the chance to see wrongs I‘d have glossed over in another life. Being transgender and disabled are totally different experiences, but I think I believe the fights for rights, access, and respect are all really connected. 3y
36 likes27 comments
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vlwelser
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Pickpick

This book is wonderful. And the library ate my original copy so I listened to the second half as an #audiobook and I don't know which was better because they are both amazing. Sarah McBride is amazing.

#SheSaid with @Riveted_Reader_Melissa
Final discussion tomorrow. Until then 🤐.

#BookSpinBingo square 2

Riveted_Reader_Melissa So glad you were able to find another copy and catch up with us! 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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Pickpick

Memoirs can be such a mixed bag sometimes, and especially written by one so young, but Sarah McBride lived such a full life already. This is her story of coming out and transitioning, but it‘s so much more than that, and in many ways that fades into the background as she tackles the very universal human issues of being accepted by family, legislative battles to be treated fairly, finding love, and experiencing painful loss.

#SheSaid

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BarbaraTheBibliophage
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Pickpick

This memoir has all the feels. Once you finish, you‘ll have plenty of talking points for your next discussion on trans equality and human rights. But mostly you‘ll appreciate McBride for all her advocacy work, even amidst plenty of personal drama and challenge. She‘s an inspiration!

Full review http://www.TheBibliophage.com #thebibliophage2021 #shesaid #nonfiction2021 #byatransauthor

Cinfhen Great review 💜 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa I‘m so glad this book came at the right time for you, and I hope your advocacy works. 3y
BarbaraTheBibliophage @Riveted_Reader_Melissa Thanks. I need to get writing my letter to the School Board ASAP! 3y
BarbaraTheBibliophage @Cinfhen Thanks! 🌈💙 3y
59 likes1 stack add4 comments
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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After a slight delay…. #SheSaid Discussion time!

Quite an intense few chapters here….a legislative battle, a cancer diagnosis, and a transition surgery, plus meeting the family! A lot to take in, in just 3 chapters. How is everyone doing with this one this week?

Riveted_Reader_Melissa Thanks for checking on me @vlwelser , fine just helping my nephew set up a computer. And no, I don‘t know how I got roped into that either.🤔 3y
tenar I don‘t have a lot to say about this section, but I sure did feel a lot! It was so emotional already, and I expect it will only get more intense. I most appreciate Sarah‘s spirit of advocacy in her writing, always connecting their experiences to the experiences of the wider community. Emotional, educational, inspirational. Awesome combo for a memoir. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Yes… I agree there. There is so much wrapped into this one. Lots more about legislative battles than I ever imagined for instance, but yet it all fits together well. 3y
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MallenNC I knew a little about Sarah‘s story so I thought I was prepared for the section on Andy‘s diagnosis but I wasn‘t. It was hard to go from their triumph in the Delaware legislature to the personal sadness in this section. I‘ve really enjoyed the book and getting to know more about Sarah, even the parts that were sad. 3y
Amiable This sounds fascinating… stacking! 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC I know, even when I knew it was coming, it was still heart wrenchingly sad. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @Amiable It‘s very good, lots going on in this memoir. 3y
BarbaraTheBibliophage This section was intense for me. Our school district is actively trying to restrict transgender athletes from playing on teams that match their gender identity. So I felt extra glad for the education from State Rep. McBride. (Is it a spoiler to say she‘s now a State Rep in DE?) 3y
KathyWheeler I‘ve been reading by the schedule but I think I have the schedule wrong. I just finished chapter 7 today because I thought 7-9 were the chapters we were reading this week. Geez! 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @BarbaraTheBibliophage Not anymore! 😂. She needs to run for Federal office too. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KathyWheeler No problem, some people have finished and a few are behind because their books came in later. This one has us all a bit scattered throughout. Just check out last weeks discussion instead, and it will be fine. 3y
34 likes12 comments
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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#SheSaid discussion time!

It was very hard putting this one down in the middle of a heated debate for rights and the fight to get a bill passed…. I can see why a few of you have gone on ahead and finished it up already. If you‘ve finished, that‘s fine…same if you‘re still reading along with the schedule…either way how‘s it going? Feeling inspired?

vlwelser That debate on the Delaware Senate (or the House I can't really remember which it was) floor was amazing. It's more powerful being a first person witness/participant account. That bathroom argument continues to seem ridiculous. It's hard not to read ahead. This is really well written and an inspiring story. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser The Senate and yes… it‘s still the same arguments and basically they boil down to some people aren‘t allowed to use the bathroom. She compares it to gay rights arguments of the past, but it always makes me think of “whites only fountains” of the past, some humans are human enough to drink or use the bathroom some aren‘t. It‘s dehumanizing, it limits both travel, time out, and basic human needs. And for me it‘s the same argument ⤵️ 3y
MallenNC I have always been interested in politics (though often disappointed by politicians) so I enjoyed this section about her political advocacy. I thought it was very powerful when she talked about having to fight for transgender people‘s human dignity, and how that‘s not fair. I was happy to see how her family became advocates too. I was able to stop myself from reading ahead but it was hard! 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ that gets recycled every time….group x is too animalistic/inhuman to be able to share public spaces with “regular” humans (whoever the in-group is in the argument). Imagine if the argument was, it‘s too dangerous for women to use public restrooms because they could be attacked, so we are just going to get rid of women‘s restrooms. 🤔. Think how much that would limit where you could go and what you could do? 3y
MallenNC @vlwelser I live in North Carolina (born and raised) where we had an embarrassing, unnecessary, and awful “bathroom bill” that ultimately caused our state to lose millions of dollars. Unfortunately I think the loss of money and a Democratic governor were the only reasons the law was finally repealed. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC I felt the same way…I wanted to read on to the House and see how it turned out. So even though I could google the end, she writes it so well I want to see what happens next. 3y
MallenNC @Riveted_Reader_Melissa I resisted that too! I want to read it in her words. I will be reading it today! 3y
tenar Looks like we‘re all experiencing similar feelings! I was enthralled by the vote-gathering and the floor debate. What a cliffhanger!

My major take away from this portion was her continual return to the belief that her strongest position was authenticity. I think her successfully standing back up in front of the Senate to refocus the debate on real people like her over the hypothetical bathroom flimflam showed how correct she was in that belief.
3y
tenar And her sharing how hard it can be to lobby for legislation or recognition for a group you belong to touched me. I struggle to not take opposition deeply personally when advocating for issues that affect me directly.

And I also thought a lot about her wanting to be recognized both as a woman and transgender. Two identities she wanted equally to share with the world and be validated in. She helped me see better how those identities are unique.
3y
KathyWheeler I‘m reading along with the schedule; in fact, I‘m a little behind. My main takeaway is about me, not McBride. I understand so little about this issue that I‘m embarrassed by it. My understanding comes from what little I‘ve seen on tv, and, as McBride points out, that‘s problematic. 3y
BarbaraTheBibliophage I couldn‘t have asked for better timing to read this. The school district where my taxes go wants to force trans kids to participate in sports according to their gender at birth, not their gender identity. Our local LGBTQ coalition is fighting it with the ACLU, but I also want to write a letter to the school board to counter the 100 or so folks who showed up at the last meeting in support of the proposal. McBride is helping me with ally language. (edited) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Yes! I struggle with that too, if you bring up your personal experiences somehow I always feel like I‘m playing the victim or it‘s seen that way, or that exaggerating, or that I‘m selfish and making a fuss. It‘s hard to describe, but I think she did a great job with that conundrum and explained it well. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KathyWheeler We all have to start somewhere… this book is great, but the first one I read that really got to me was Being Jazz….it helped me understand how they knew so much so young and why it wasn‘t ok to discount their feeling just because they were young, the old it‘s a phase and they‘ll grow out of it idea. I hear that one a lot, that they can‘t really know what they want yet… but as this one and the one I tagged show…they really do. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KathyWheeler Another great one is Janet Mock‘s if you want to read more. Not only did she know, but she wanted the surgery and her struggles through some very tough things to try and come up with that kind of money so young, first for hormones and then for surgery before her testosterone kicked in with puberty and changed her body more were harrowing…not to mention finding a doctor willing to do the surgery. Sarah‘s is a struggle, but for ⤵️ 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ acceptance from those around her cane so much easier (which is saying a lot considering the obstacles she faced.) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @BarbaraTheBibliophage Yes…. Finding the right language is so difficult, I have a hard time expressing what I think on some of these subjects in the correct way, and I‘m sure I‘ve made mistakes, but still write the letter even if it‘s not perfect. Talking about the bathroom issue, can you imaging the locker room issue… HS locker rooms tend to be full of teen harassment anyway, but having a trans person go into the one they don‘t identify with ⤵️ 3y
staci.reads @BarbaraTheBibliophage I'm so glad you are writing to your district about the issue. Often people in charge (superintendents, school boards, etc) only hear from the same group of people with every issue and mistakenly think those few voices represent the many. It becomes an echo chamber. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa …that‘s just asking for them to be bullied. 3y
staci.reads We fear the things we don't understand. The people opposing the bill weren't working from a place of information, but one of fear. 3y
staci.reads She does a nice job of balancing information and personal emotional responses in her narrative. I am so impressed by her commitment to living her true life. 3y
vivastory My apologies if you already posted about this event, but I just saw the following author event on B&N site & figured that the Star Wars group would be interested:
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bn-virtually-presents-star-wars-the-high-republic-p...
3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vivastory Thank you! I did not, but I‘ll check it out! 3y
vlwelser Are you ok over there? I didn't do the reading because the library ate my book. But normally you post before now. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser Yes, fine. I‘m just sitting down to do it now. My nephew got a new computer that arrived by FedEx on a Sunday….so I‘ve been setting up a computer and monitor for the last few hours. 3y
vlwelser Good. Just checking. 😊 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser I‘m so sorry your library ate your book, I‘ve become very proficient at turning off my WiFi on my kindle at some times so things don‘t return until I finish them… shhh. 3y
vlwelser I have another copy on hold. I should have planned better. I'll hopefully catch up with you all next week. 3y
39 likes27 comments
review
staci.reads
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Pickpick

I had to finish this one ahead of schedule because I couldn't quit reading Sarah's story. She is impressive and the things she has experienced in her short life are more than many people deal with in a lifetime. She's brave and inspiring, and I'm so glad I read this. #SheSaid @Riveted_Reader_Melissa

Riveted_Reader_Melissa So glad you liked this one. 3y
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mhillis
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Pickpick

Tomorrow Will be Different is the June #SheSaid book. Thank you @Riveted_Reader_Melissa for putting this on my radar! I finished ahead of schedule because I need to return it. Before reading, I had only heard the name Sarah McBride, but now I know her story—she‘s definitely going to need to write another memoir!

violabrain This book is amazing! I cried so many times while reading this... 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa I‘m so glad you liked it! 3y
marleed This is the only book I finished, awarded 5 stars, and immediately walked up my street to place it in an LFL. I love my shelves to be a mix of TBRs as well as books I loved reading. But this one couldn‘t sit on my shelf as a reminder of a great story or lesson. This one had to be released back to the world so she could enlighten others, like she did me. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @marleed I love that, and yes….some books need to be read by more people! 3y
mhillis @violabrain @Riveted_Reader_Melissa @marleed Yes great book to share! Her passion for politics and activism is amazing 3y
55 likes1 stack add5 comments
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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#SheSaid discussion time!

What a difference from our last read, from quick snapshots of a person‘s life/generation to a deeply personal story.

I‘m really liking the causal tone in this one so far. How is everyone else doing?

KathyWheeler I haven‘t started this yet, but will today. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KathyWheeler It‘s a fairly quick read so far, so it shouldn‘t take you long to catch up. 3y
NeedsMoreBooks @RivetedLit hi! I realized that I have not been able to read some of the books. I would like to withdraw from this. Sorry 😞 3y
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sabyym Just started the book but I‘m excited to read her story. The fact that when she decided to come out to the public she had a leadership role is brave as heck. (edited) 3y
tenar I‘m enjoying the tone here, too, and pacing. It feels quite breezy to read while still touching my emotions. For me, I was taken aback a bit by how Sarah‘s mom reacted to her coming out. I have somewhat conservative parents, and I can imagine them not accepting and adjusting. But I can‘t imagine them saying things directly that would make me feel so guilty, like “please don‘t do this” and “I feel like you‘re dying.” I really naively thought … 3y
tenar that if a family accepted LGBTQ+ identity beforehand, they wouldn‘t struggle with so much with both fear AND grief. I can see in reality it‘s very complicated, especially for parents and children. It sounded like her mom was grieving her own imagined future for her child, in addition to fearing what the world may bring for her. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @NeedsMoreBooks No problem. If you see any you want to jump in on later, just let me know and I‘ll re-add you. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @sabyym Yes it is! I completely agree. 3y
MallenNC I am enjoying her story so much. I love books that give me a glimpse of a life that is different from mine. It really builds my understanding. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar I‘ve heard it explained just that way….they had a son their whole life and an idea of the person he would grow up to be, then they hear the news and it‘s grief over the death of that real son they had and that imagined son he could be. 3y
MallenNC @tenar I was surprised by the parents‘ reaction too. I can understand being concerned for your child but her mother‘s reaction was more than I expected. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar So they often go through the stages of grief… like denial and bargaining. 3y
MallenNC I really liked the parts where she talks about how other people can shape reaction to a transgender person. Like her political mentor and the judge at the name change hearing. That positive reaction made such a difference. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC Yes, me too. I loved Jazz‘s book, sometimes I think when they know and can say it younger it‘s easier on the family because they shift earlier… but I know people of an older generation think that‘s too young to make those kinds of decisions. If your interested her book is 3y
MallenNC @Riveted_Reader_Melissa I haven‘t read that one yet. I did read a book called Becoming Nicole about someone who transitioned at a younger age. Her parents were really impressive. It‘s written by a reporter. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC Yes, I thought that was a great point about prejudice too. Modeling from role models and people of influence/power models behavior on how to treat people. Just like parents modeling behavior for children. We really are social animals and like to fit in, so when accepting or denying behavior is modeled, it tends to affect those not sure how to react. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC I‘ll have to add that one to my to-read list too. 3y
tenar @Riveted_Reader_Melissa That is so interesting, and really makes a huge point about how all-encompassing ideas about gender and sex are in our culture. Your child is right there in front of you, alive and well, and the idea of a gender transition can make you feel like they‘re gone, and all of your ideas about their future are gone. It‘s pretty wild when I think about it like that. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @MallenNC I liked how very honest she is about all those choices, and how she could pass, keep on, just to make everyone around her happier, but it felt like a lie…. And felt unhappy. It reminded me of things I‘ve read about gay people in earlier generations, who got married anyway, had families, and only later came out and could be themselves after the world changed a little…and how tough that was. I always find it very sad that society could⤵️ 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa …pressure people so hard, that they chose to live in ways they didn‘t want rather than face the huge backlash society could/would push back with. 3y
MallenNC @Riveted_Reader_Melissa It is definitely reminiscent of that. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Right! It really highlights how much we in this society don‘t feel the sexes are equal and capable of the same things. A young boy who wants to go into politics and be President someday, but a trans-daughter couldn‘t have the same dreams/life path. 3y
tenar @sabyym @MallenNC Yes, I was frankly amazed by her courage to come out in such a public way, and moved by how a few strong, supportive voices led to an overall positive outcome. I don‘t know if I‘d be brave enough to have that much trust in my network. I‘d want to run away and start a new life out of fear! She correctly believed in her community, and that made me proud of both her and them. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @tenar Yes! I‘m with you… run away, change my name, and then start over. It‘s incredibly brave, and she was very lucky her to have built the community around her that she needed… which says a lot for her too, surround yourself and build your adoptive family with good people. 3y
vlwelser I love this. I had a hard time putting it down. My favorite part so far was when she was talking about the difference between navigating the world as a woman as opposed to a man. And obviously being transgender adds a whole extra level of danger. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser I thought that was a very interesting observation too, and as a woman it‘s always nice to have those feels you‘ve had validated by someone new, as opposed to waved away as all in your head. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @NeedsMoreBooks You‘re very welcome. 3y
KVanRead I went ahead and listened to this on audio early last month as I knew I‘d be too busy with school this month. I‘m so glad I did because I absolutely loved it. I so admire everything about Sarah and the way she tells her story. @tenar @MallenNC I also found the part with her mom really hard but so appreciate that she and her family were willing to share that so honestly. I think it‘s really important to see for trans people and their families ⤵️ (edited) 3y
KVanRead …given how her parents come around and become such vital supporters. So important to see that even more liberal parents might struggle but just because they do doesn‘t mean they can‘t grow and turn it around. Might give hope to those going through this. And instructive for all of us to see just because you or someone else doesn‘t get it yet doesn‘t mean they can‘t or won‘t. Sarah so bravely helps others learn and grow over and over. (edited) 3y
mhillis This is really interesting so far! I‘ve just finished the first three chapters. What stood out for me was the support she received at university. I‘m looking forward to reading the next part. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @mhillis Me too, looking forward to the next part that is…and yes, how far we‘ve come as a society (at least in some places), I can almost guarantee my university wouldn‘t be that good when I attended or even today. 3y
TheBookbabeblog84 I didn‘t know Sarah Wrote a book. I‘ll have to add it to my TBR. She‘s such a wonderful person (and A fellow Delawarean). 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @TheBookbabeblog84 It‘s very good so far! And she talks highly of being a proud Delawarean. 3y
tenar @KVanRead I‘m so glad to hear you enjoyed the whole thing! I thought about that, too, and I think you‘ve put it absolutely perfectly. I bet it wasn‘t easy to share so openly the raw emotions of those days, and I think it‘s something invaluable for us readers to glimpse. I can‘t wait to see how her relationship with her parents changes and grows! 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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#SheSaid Just a reminder of what‘s coming up in the future months, so go ahead and put in your library (or interlibrary) loans!

LauraBrook Ooooh, off to see what my library has! 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @LauraBrook We‘d love to have you join us for any of them. 3y
vlwelser I'm excited to get started with this. It seems like it might be really different than what we have read so far. At least the subject. 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @vlwelser Yes... We did a special vote for something appropriate for Pride Month. We tend to have good variety overall, but every once in awhile there is a specific group that we seem to be missing when I make the schedule. Last time it was no black authors, so I pulled Well Read Black Girl from the honorable mentions, this time we had good representation there, but no LGBTQIA. I think next time I‘m going to ask for some native authors and ⤵️ 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa ↪️ handicapped authors/issues, which we haven‘t had a lot of. 3y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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Just a reminder, our next book for #SheSaid and the schedule for anyone who may have missed it before or would like to join in.

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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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Just a reminder that June‘s read for #SheSaid will be Tomorrow Will Be Different. If you‘d like to join us, just let me know below and I‘ll add you to the group‘s tag. Otherwise, put in your library holds /interlibrary loans if you haven‘t already.

sabyym Just a fyi, I‘m interested in all the books you‘ve mentioned for this year so you can automatically assume I‘ll be joining every month. It‘s a great selection :) 3y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @sabyym Thank you, this group always nominates great choices, and there are always good ones that we just don‘t get too. We‘ll be voting again and adding more later this year (I try to keep it planned out at least 6 months in advance so everyone can make library requests and add books to hold lists). So keep that in mind if you see anything you‘d like to nominate next time around and jot it down somewhere. 3y
mhillis I‘ve got my copy! 3y
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Nalbuque
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Pickpick

this was so depressing 😭😭😭😭😭

#2021 #LGBTQ #WomenAuthors

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Riveted_Reader_Melissa
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa Now any recommendations for the rest of 2021? Below I‘ll list the runners up from last year to start us off. 4y
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Riveted_Reader_Melissa And I‘ll also add this one to the possibility list 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa And I‘m sure someone else sent me another recommendation, but I can‘t find it right this second.... I‘ll add it when I find it, but if you stop here first please add it yourself and sorry I temporarily misplaced it. 😕 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa And by the same author as our earlier one Person, No Vote 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @kspenmoll Here‘s our pick for June, and if you are interested in joining in, please feel free to nominate books for the next vote. 4y
arlenefinnigan Added to my BorrowBox reading list. Look forward to it! 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa And 1 I‘ve recommended a few times now and should reread 4y
Suet624 Great! 4y
KVanRead So many good books! Wordslut and So You Want to Talk About Race are high on my list. 4y
KVanRead And I may be the only person who hasn‘t already read this 4y
KVanRead Okay done! Sorry!! 🤓 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa @KVanRead Don‘t be sorry! I‘m so glad someone else is adding books too! 4y
MallenNC One of Melissa‘s comments on the post for this month‘s book reminded me of one I wanted to suggest. It‘s about women leaders of the civil rights movement & just came out back in the fall. 4y
Riveted_Reader_Melissa I think I‘m going to add Redefining Realnees to this list as well 4y
MallenNC Here‘s a few more that I just found on my own TBR 4y
tenar Oh, I bought Minor Feelings last year and forgot to read it! I guess I‘ll throw some books in the pot, one I plan to reread and one I haven‘t started yet - 4y
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rainbowlibrarian
Pickpick

An absolutely critical read. I think it hits even harder now than it did when it was first published in 2018. Heartbreaking, honest, and above all...full of hope. I am truly in awe of now Senator McBride.

Do yourself a favor and get this one on audiobook if you can.

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sarahlandis
Pickpick

I really really loved this book. It took me a little while to get into it- memoir style books aren't really my thing right now, and I was just skeptical in general. But WOW, Sarah is an amazing woman and I was just captivated by her story. It wasn't just that she has perseverance, but rather there is just no other option other than moving forward for her, that is truly amazing.

sarahlandis This is a book that is inherently political, but mostly it's stories. And stories are important, especially when they come from under-represented perspectives. I also really appreciated how Sarah talked about her hardships while discussing her privilege. It added depth and sincerity to her book. 4y
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heatherspoetlife
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Pickpick

A great read for anyone looking for books on trans equality! It's not Pride Month, but do we really have to wait for that one month to pay attention to their fight? ⠀
Check out Sarah McBride's memoir. There's a lot of good stuff. She does an amazing job of including probable outcomes within her story and making sure the reader gets a full picture of trans issues while also telling a very personal and nuanced story. She's really quite impressive.⠀

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alisonrose
Pickpick

Rating a memoir feels odd, like you‘re saying “this is how many stars I give your life.” So you have to separate the “life” from other stuff. McBride has had quite a journey so far & for the most part writes powerfully about her experience as a trans woman fighting for equality. But it was heavier on the personal stuff than I expected, got a bit repetitive, & stayed fairly 101. Think it just needed a stronger editing hand. Still recommend! 3/5 ⭐️

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alisonrose

Transgender ppl shouldn‘t be treated w/dignity b/c of how some of us look;we should be treated w/dignity b/c we are human beings. The trans community is as diverse as any community. Some...conform to traditional expressions of gender, while others transgress those boundaries in various ways, just like cisgender ppl. If our pursuit of equality is built on the ability of some of us to blend in, then we will leave many of the most marginalized behind

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alisonrose
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alisonrose
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Major eyeroll at “Foreword by Joe Biden” but otherwise I‘m glad to finally be picking this one up. (Yes, I‘m a Democrat, but I‘m a far left progressive who wants the old white dudes to just step the fuck aside for once in their lives, especially when they get all grumpypants anytime anyone challenges them about anything. Sorry, rant over. Time to read!) #nowreading

violabrain This book is amazing! 5y
marleed I loved this book so much that when I finished I immediately put it in a LFL in hopes the next reader would be equally touched. Now I wish I‘d placed a sticky notes inside to tell them so! 5y
rachelk Ok, I just added this to my reading list. I love your comment regarding the forward ❤️🙌🎉 5y
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alisonrose @violabrain 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 5y
alisonrose @marleed Oh, but it‘s terrific that you shared it! 5y
alisonrose @rachelk 😏😏😏 5y
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marleed
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Pickpick

I tend to keep or collect impactful books so my shelves are filled with books of significant meaning. However, as I head out this morning the tagged is going in a LFL. The memoir of this young, thoughtful, intelligent, ambitious transgender woman and the people in her life is inspiring. I hope someone else will pick it out, read it, and be forevermore a bit more compassionate. ...And vote.

NaomiO I have heard that it is a wonderful book. 5y
marleed @NaomiO Oh my gosh, so often there is so much sadness in the life of a trans person. Sarah‘s life is one of joy (with love evident in times of sadness). It is a wonderful testament to a person‘s potential when they are loved for the core of who they are. 5y
ValerieAndBooks Some books just need to be shared 💖 5y
marleed @ValerieAndBooks I believe this is the first time where Ive let go of my specific book because stacking on my shelves could be a missed opportunity in compassion. 5y
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ontheBL
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Pickpick

Sarah McBride is more than a trans woman; she is extraordinary. Tomorrow Will Be Better is a memoir about her life and the obstacles she has encountered and overcome. From the personal to the political, she writes with honesty, dignity, and kindness. I read the entire book through happy, sad, and hopeful tears.

https://onthebl.org/2019/06/15/tomorrow-will-be-better/

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Bookwomble
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"There are few things more dangerous to a transgender woman than the risk of a straight man not totally comfortable in his sexuality or masculinity realizing he is attracted to her.”

Weaponxgirl That just broke my heart. 💔 6y
Bookwomble @Weaponxgirl I think it's the unconscious basis of much transphobia. 6y
Weaponxgirl @Bookwomble that makes sense. It‘s the sort of thing I wish terfs would focus on as most women in general have been in a situation where they feel that kind of fear from a straight man. I wish they would focus on that and how much more we have in common in issues rather than trying to other trans women. 6y
Bookwomble @Weaponxgirl I sometimes think the acronym should be"tecfs" as their attitudes often seem more conservative than radical (though "tecfs" is harder to pronounce!) 6y
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brandybear22
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Vulnerability breeds empathy, Empathy fosters support, Support leads to action.

Provide positivity , reinforce hope. That‘s powerful.

brandybear22 @kgriffith I finished it! 6y
kgriffith Well done 😊 I‘ve been listening to it and have 3 hours left, so I‘ll probably finish on tomorrow‘s drive. 6y
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kgriffith
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“‘And if Jesus can love the leper, then I can vote for this bill.‘ A faulty comparison to be sure, but, given the circumstances, I‘d most definitely take it.” 😂

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kgriffith
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Starting this one on audio for our local queer book club later this month. I‘ve gotta say again, I‘ve been incredibly impressed with Scribd: so many popular, well-known, timely titles, both fiction and non-fiction, are immediately available as audio and/or ebook, with others only a week‘s hold out. My most-used media subscription, hands down.

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brandybear22
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Plane reading last night, about a third through. Her story is through a political lens. It is interesting to read about the internal struggle someone has, when they have had privilege protect them from so much. Not a judgment, it is hard enough for someone to deal with our society as a trans person; it is interesting to read about, without the context of the struggle related to other intersectionalities or the ability to change circumstances.

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kgriffith
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Saturday, I attended the first annual meeting of our local trans support org. Sunday, trans folks learned that they are being specifically targeted by our government. In this program is the MTN budget. Let‘s blow the “Monthly Giving” income out of the water. $5 a month will literally save lives. https://donorbox.org/thrive

RaimeyGallant I'm sorry to hear there's still oppression at this level. 6y
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overtheedge
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Pickpick



A journey from self- loathing to self- acceptance to fear about being a trans, nothing stopped Sarah from her goal, becoming an intern in the white house.
Coming out as gay was difficult, being surrounded with supportive loving acceptance, not just tolerance made it positive for everyone.
Amazing Everyone should read this.
Highly recommended
The forward by Joe Biden is absolutely wonderful, and on point.
Full review goodreads.com/overtheedge

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daniwithtea
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Pickpick

I ugly-cried through most of this book. I can‘t begin to imagine the courage it has taken to lay her life bare before the nation, and to lose her husband in the midst of it. Sarah McBride is an amazing woman doing amazing work.

SkeletonKey I‘m deep into this one and having to take breaks because yes...so many tears 😰 6y
daniwithtea @SkeletonKey in retrospect I wish I‘d taken breaks - I read it in two sittings (and half a box of tissues) 6y
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overtheedge
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A friend recommended this, so I picked it up at the library. So far, it's very interesting and making points I never thought of....Joe Biden wrote the forward!

Bklover Joe!❤️ 6y
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SkeletonKey
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Currently listening to.

#lgbtq #lgbtqa #transbooks #transbook #memoir

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daniwithtea
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Library haul! Two ILLs, two holds, and an impulse pick.

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violabrain
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Pickpick

Sarah McBride is coming to speak in my town next week, so I had to read her memoir before then! I couldn‘t put this book down. She is a fierce and eloquent advocate for trans rights and equality. I laughed, I cried (with joy, with grief, with anger), and I am so grateful to have read this book. So very highly recommended.

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Twocougs
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Pickpick

Fantastic book about Sarah‘s experience as a transgender woman.

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ZoeyPeacock
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Surprise book mail today. This looks really good!

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kedupre
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Pickpick

Please, read this book. The world would be a kinder place if everyone read this. She is so talented at earning empathy, without ever once asking for pity.