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Lost & Found
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
An enduring account of love and loss from one of the great writers of our time, The New Yorkers Kathryn Schultz, winner of the Pulitzer Prize An extraordinary gift of a book, a tender, searching meditation on love and loss and what it means to be human. I wept at it, laughed with it, was entirely fascinated by it. I emerged feeling a little as if the world around me had been made anew.Helen Macdonald, author of H Is for Hawk and Vesper Flights Eighteen months before Kathryn Schulzs beloved father died, she met the woman she would marry. In Lost & Found, she weaves the stories of those relationships into a brilliant exploration of how all our lives are shaped by loss and discoveryfrom the maddening disappearance of everyday objects to the sweeping devastations of war, pandemic, and natural disaster; from finding new planets to falling in love. Three very different American families form the heart of Lost & Found: the one that made Schulzs father, a charming, brilliant, absentminded Jewish refugee; the one that made her partner, an equally brilliant farmers daughter and devout Christian; and the one she herself makes through marriage. But Schulz is also attentive to other, more universal kinds of conjunction: how private happiness can coexist with global catastrophe, how we get irritated with those we adore, how love and loss are themselves unavoidably inseparable. The resulting book is part memoir, part guidebook to living in a world that is simultaneously full of wonder and joy and wretchedness and sufferinga world that always demands both our gratitude and our grief. A staff writer at The New Yorker and winner of the Pulitzer Prize, Kathryn Schulz writes with curiosity, tenderness, erudition, and wit about our finite yet infinitely complicated lives. Crafted with the emotional clarity of C. S. Lewis and the intellectual force of Susan Sontag, Lost & Found is an uncommon book about common experiences.
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review
HeatherBookNerd
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

This thoughtful, erudite memoir has two parts: the grief she felt in losing her beloved father, and falling in love with her future wife. Schultz shares vulnerable, personal moments from both experiences, but then goes a step further to explore the more universal vicissitudes of love and grief. A bit academic even, but so insightful. Since these two experiences overlapped, she discusses finding a greater appreciation in the dualities of life.

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BarbaraBB
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Mehso-so

In this memoir writes about the father she lost and the love she found. I was especially interested in the first part, but for me that turned out disappointing. It read almost like a scientific article and I couldn‘t relate to it. I did enjoy the second part though, which makes the book a so-so I guess.

Suet624 I believe this was a low pick for me so I understand how you feel about it. 2mo
59 likes1 comment
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BarbaraBB
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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#WeeklyForecast 39/24

I am reading and thoroughly enjoying The Frozen River. Next will be Brief Lives which I didn‘t get to last week. Hopefully there‘ll be time to start the tagged one as well.

BarbaraJean Lost & Found is lovely! 2mo
Suet624 I\'ll be curious what you think about Lost and Found. I read it a while back and seem to remember enjoying quite a bit of it. 2mo
BarbaraBB @BarbaraJean @Suet624 That is encouraging. I bought it shortly after my own father died and didn‘t dare pick it up for a while. 2mo
Suet624 Oh yeah. Good call. 2mo
57 likes4 comments
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Graywacke
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

Personal essays on losing her father and finding her partner. Although the first part of the book is on loss and grief, it‘s really a happy book about a happy childhood and loving relationships. Shulz is an elegant nonfiction writer who writes for the New Yorker magazine.

47 likes1 stack add
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Graywacke
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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My semi-appropriate hurricane reading…

To be clear, I‘m still trying to fly home to my hurricane struck house…. 🙁

Bookwormjillk Oh no! I Hope there‘s not damage. 4mo
dabbe 🤞that everything's okay. 🙏 4mo
Graywacke @Bookwormjillk @dabbe thanks. I only just found out, but house and cat at ok. 4mo
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AllDebooks So glad your house is ok and all are safe x 4mo
Bookwormjillk @Graywacke whew, that‘s a relief. I hope you get home soon. 4mo
dabbe Whew! 😅 4mo
Crazeedi Glad everything is OK, things are really bad some places! 4mo
Aimeesue Glad the house and cat are OK! Scary stuff. 4mo
48 likes8 comments
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IndoorDame
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Alyisha, I just received the most gorgeous, decadent package from you and Moxie Crimefighter! Thank you so much for all the gifts! I feel very spoiled and I can‘t wait to dive into this beautiful book and my new tea! And thank you for another amazing year of #auldlangspine

P.S. Cedric approves, and says bunnies smell weird and amazing and he‘d like to meet one someday!

monalyisha I love that Cedric and Moxie got to share this moment! And I‘m glad the package lived up to the wait. 😉 8mo
57 likes1 comment
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monalyisha
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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@IndoorDame Moxie hath spoken!

You‘ve won the #AuldLangSpine giveaway. Congrats! 🥳 I think you were leaning towards the tagged book. Does your choice still stand?

Send me an email over at monalitsy@gmail.com with your mailing address and I‘ll send you a little package in the next week or two.

Thanks for participating!

AmyG Ha! Congrats @IndoorDame 🎉🙌🏻 9mo
Alwaysbeenaloverofbooks Congratulations 🎈🎉 9mo
IndoorDame Thank you @monalyisha !!! Yes, I‘d love to read the tagged book! And thank you to Moxie! Have I told you lately what a cute smart 🐇 you are? 9mo
See All 7 Comments
monalyisha @IndoorDame Compliments will get you everywhere. She feels fully vindicated in her choice. 9mo
SpellboundReader 👏🎉Yay! 9mo
dabbe Congrats! 🤩🤩🤩 9mo
Zuhkeeyah Congrats!! 👏🏾 9mo
66 likes7 comments
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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“…what serves us best, in the face of inexorable loss, is not our grief or our acquiescence but our attention.”

monalyisha What a perfect picture (to pair with some major Mary Oliver vibes). 😉🐇 10mo
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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“I, too, feel that way: that my days are exceptional even when they are ordinary, that existence does not need to show us any of its more famous or spectacular wonders to fill us with amazement. We live remarkable lives because life itself is remarkable, a fact that is impossible not to notice if only suffering leaves us alone for long enough.”

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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“What an astonishing thing it is to find someone. Loss may alter our sense of scale, reminding us that the world is overwhelmingly large while we are incredibly tiny. But finding does the same; the only difference is that it makes us marvel rather than despair.”

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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“Other than the internet, is there any richer source of potential embarrassment than a pack-rat parent and a childhood home?”

😂

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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“…there is a limit to how close you can get to people who do not care about the same questions you do, not through any failure on their part but simply because their minds orient along different meridians than yours. Conversely, the wonderful lesson I learned from falling in love with C. is that if you do care about the same questions, it doesn‘t necessarily matter if you arrive at the same answers.”

BarbaraJean #AuldLangSpine @monalyisha Lost & Found quote extravaganza coming your way! 😏 10mo
CSeydel Oh, man! I feel like these are the perfect words for a concept I‘m often trying to describe - someone whose mind “orients along different meridians” than mine does (edited) 10mo
BarbaraJean @CSeydel I know, right? This clarified and helped define my frustrations with a couple of people on a committee that I lead. Our minds orient along different meridians, and we do not care about the same questions. Having that definition is oddly helpful in thinking about working with these people going forward. 10mo
monalyisha This is how my husband & I work. We may struggle to agree on the ideal temperature for our home, about what to order on our shared pizza, etc etc…but we care about the same questions, so it all shakes out. 💞 10mo
24 likes4 comments
review
BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

I can‘t get over how gorgeous this cover is, with its swoopy ampersand of stars against that dark blue. And the writing is equally gorgeous: from sentences to pacing—and the overall construction of the book—it‘s impeccable. Schulz reflects on losing her father and finding her partner, offering a beautiful meditation on grief and loss, love and finding, and how both are inextricably linked. #AuldLangSpine

monalyisha Great review! I think this book is a great litmus test for how well we‘re actually matched (good job, me! 😆😉). There are people who‘d declare this not their cup of tea. For those of us who do enjoy the blend, however, we‘re left wildly asking, “How could that be?!” Glad you‘re with me. 10mo
BarbaraJean @monalyisha Ha! Glad I/we passed the test!😏 One of the things that fascinated me about this book is how individual her experiences were, of both loss & finding. It was fascinating to feel like I was inside someone else's experience, able to understand how different it was from my own--and also to resonate with her writing & reflections, even where my experiences of love & loss feel vastly different. Yet I can also see how that's not for everyone. 10mo
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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“Amazement, gratitude, wonder, awe: the feelings inspired in us by serendipitous finds are the same ones inspired in us by the cosmos as a whole, and for the same reason—because life gave us something splendid that we did not expect, did not ask for, and did not in any particular way deserve.”

#AuldLangSpine

monalyisha I love that you‘re reading this right now; it‘s almost like I‘m reading it all over again. 💞 10mo
BarbaraJean @monalyisha So you're saying it won't be overkill if I post ALL of the passages I've marked throughout the book? 😆 10mo
monalyisha @BarbaraJean That‘s *exactly* what I‘m saying! Litsy takeover! 😆 10mo
BarbaraJean @monalyisha 😂😂 Coming right up!! 10mo
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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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“…at its core, finding something always resembles that moment, dear to the heart of six-year-olds, of spotting a penny on the ground: you are the one standing there looking when the world shifts just so and some bright glimmer—a knickknack at the junk shop, the first shining edge of a brilliant idea, the woman you will marry—catches your eye.”

So much beautiful writing in this book!

#AuldLangSpine

monalyisha I‘m so glad you think so, too! ✨ 10mo
BarbaraJean @monalyisha I‘m blown away by her writing. It‘s so well done! 10mo
28 likes2 comments
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BarbaraJean
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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The January #BookSpin fates have selected one #AuldLangSpine pick and one book from my Kindle TBR. And it‘s handy that I already have Lost & Found cued up from the library. 😁 Looks like it‘s going to be a good reading month!

monalyisha Wow, I *love* the cover of your #BookSpin book. 🤩 10mo
TheAromaofBooks Yay!! Enjoy!! 10mo
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BarbaraJean
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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First library hold is in for #AuldLangSpine2024! I‘ll save it until Monday, but it‘s downloaded and ready to go! 🎉🥂

monalyisha Exciting stuff! 11mo
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charl08
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Reading with my sister's dog. She's very warm!

This ... can leave us feeling two different ways. One of them, akin to the feeling of losing something, is that the universe is dauntingly large and we are terrifyingly insignificant. The other, akin to the feeling of finding, is that the universe is dauntingly large and yet here we are, unimaginably unlikely and therefore precious beyond measure.

Suet624 Beautiful quote. Thank you. 1y
humouress Exactly how I feel, at different times 1y
charl08 @Suet624 lots of beautiful writing here @humouress I need to remember it more I think! 1y
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Cinfhen
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

IRL bookclub tomorrow night 🤓Gorgeous prose but for a rather slim book it‘s VERY WORDY 😉 I found this book very intimate and personal. Grief affects everyone differently but I can imagine how truthful this book will be for many. I enjoyed the audio read by the author.

charl08 Beautiful flowers! 1y
Cinfhen Thanks @charl08 I love sunflowers 🌻 🌻 1y
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charl08
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Stars and quiet filled the sky. All around us, the universe was expanding, not from something, not into anything, all on its own, changing the scale of space, stretching the boundaries of existence. Gravity, electromagnetism, the strong and the weak, all the known and unknown forces were exerting themselves on the cosmos.

charl08 If we felt them, if we ever feel them, we did not know it, brimming as we were with our own forces, spinning inside it all like the tiniest of Ptolemy's heavenly spheres. 1y
Cinfhen I‘m listening to the audio now. She‘s a GORGEOUS writer - her sentences are lyrical and vivid. 1y
charl08 @Cinfhen she is. I had to put this down a couple of months ago but now seem to be in a good place for it. 1y
Cinfhen I‘m not sure I‘d be able to read this if I was grieving - it‘s way too raw. It‘s for IRL bookclub and two of the women recently “lost” their fathers. I‘ll be curious to hear their thoughts 1y
charl08 @Cinfhen for me it comes in waves. Now the book is OK- next week, who knows. I imagine if the group discussing this one gives those grieving space to speak about their loss and be heard it will be invaluable. 1y
49 likes5 comments
review
Michellesibs
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Panpan

My experience of grief in the last 16 months has been messy, unpredictable and life has stripped by back to its dirtiest, rawest form. This prose here is full of flowers, blissfully idyllic, meandering down country lanes filled with butterflies which made it unrelatable.

Unfortunately the only take away for me was how the alphabet once included &.

Your mileage is going to vary here relating to your own grief experience.

Cinfhen This is my IRL bookclub pick for June - it‘s been getting mixed results from the ladies. 1y
Michellesibs @Cinfhen So interesting, it was also the pick for my bookclub and like yours there's was very mixed reactions! 1y
43 likes2 comments
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AllDebooks
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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What a wonderful event #AuldLangSpine was. I had a blast and managed to read 3 books from @jenniferw88 recommended list. I've stacked many more to continue with over the year.
Thank you so much for your brilliant hosting and matching skills @monalyisha
I would love to read the tagged. It's got great reviews 😊

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Amiable
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Thank you for everything you do for #AuldLangSpine, Alyisha —the concept, the coordination, the matching and now this giveaway! Tagged is the book I would love to receive and read in 2023 because it came onto my radar (and onto my TBR) after seeing your review of it. 🙂
#AuldLangSpineGiveaway

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TheKidUpstairs
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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"... he loved to bend a phrase right up to the breaking point before letting it spring back into place, reverberating wildly."

Suet624 I particularly liked the first half of this book. 2y
TheKidUpstairs @Suet624 I've just started. She writes so beautifully! 2y
Chelsea.Poole ♥️♥️♥️ 2y
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TheKidUpstairs
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Getting set for #AuldLangSpine 🥂🎉 reading with @Chelsea.Poole

These are the ones my library offered physical copies of. I also have one physical book I'll be picking up from another library next week (tagged), and lots available for e-reading.

@monalyisha

Chelsea.Poole Yay!! 👏 …also, How To Be Perfect is great on audio if you try that this year. I can‘t remember if that‘s one I mentioned as working well as an audiobook or not. As is Precious Days! ☺️☺️ (edited) 2y
53 likes1 comment
review
monalyisha
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

Wow! This is a memoir, and a reflection on the meaning of three words (or two words and one letter, if you travel back in time to before the late 1800‘s): “lost”, “found”, and “&”. It‘s written by a writer who is a lover of poetry; a lover of life; a lover. She muses, at length (and depth) about losing her father, finding the love of her life, and connection. I now want to read other pieces by her…as well as pieces by her wife, Casey Cep. 👇🏻

monalyisha 1/1: At one point, Schulz mentions that she‘s a secular (atheist) Jew, while “C” (as she calls her) is a devout Lutheran and ordained minister, as well as a writer. With my interest in religion and spirituality, this made me sit up and take note! I‘m happy for the journey that listening to this lovely audiobook has inspired. (edited) 2y
monalyisha Thanks to @Chelsea.Poole for putting this on your #AuldLangSpine list. And @JamieArc, I know I keep doing this…& it‘s easy to do without the benefit of time passing to see if books you love “stick”…but I really, really mean it this time! This should *definitely* be on my #AuldLangSpine list. In fact, if I remember, I may add it to next‘s year‘s. 😏 (edited) 2y
monalyisha You can feel Mary Oliver‘s influence here, and her insistence that “attention is the beginning of devotion” (though I don‘t think Schulz ever mentions her explicitly, as she does Whitman & Elizabeth Bishop). But I love nothing more than a piece of writing that seems to come from an Oliver acolyte! 🍃 (edited) 2y
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JamieArc Any Mary Oliver reference will make me turn my head. Stacking! 2y
monalyisha @JamieArc Same! 👯‍♀️ 2y
Chelsea.Poole You describe it perfectly. I felt such a connection to this earlier in the year. It may be my most favorite of 2022! So happy to heat it was a winner for you too! 2y
monalyisha Thanks, @Chelsea.Poole! Glad to hear I did it justice! 2y
kspenmoll Sounds wonderful- stacking, & checking my library! 2y
69 likes3 stack adds8 comments
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Hooked_on_books
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

Called a memoir, but much, much more. Schulz explores her father‘s death, meeting her wife, and the very concepts of losing and finding and what those things mean in our lives. This is thoughtful and interesting and really lovely.

Chelsea.Poole One of my favorites this year! 2y
BarbaraBB This sounds like my kind of book in this phase of my life. Stacked. 2y
Hooked_on_books @BarbaraBB I initially didn‘t want to read it, but it ended up on the National Book Award long list, and I‘m reading them all. I‘m so glad I did—it‘s so good. Hope you like it! 2y
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Suet624
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

There are 3 essays in this book. The 1st is Lost & that is the one I was most struck by. The author writes of her father-his life, his illness & his passing. It is a glorious piece of work, one that I immediately wanted to share with my friend whose sister passed away. Of the last 3 books I read about a parent dying, this one hit all the key points in such an elegant way. I appreciate her effort in expressing the inexpressible.

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Erynecki
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

A three part memoir. I really marveled at the Lost segment. After abruptly losing my mom in 2012, I began searching for my great grandfather‘s lost paintings. That said, much of the Lost segment resonated with me. I wished I had written many of its marvelous and insightful sentences. I enjoyed Found - the telling of her finding and growing the relationship with her (eventual) wife. I confess to skimming the third section: AND.

Suet624 This first section - LOST - is stunning. I keep rereading sentences.
2y
Erynecki @Suet624 my favorite section of that book! 2y
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Chelsea.Poole
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

An amazing memoir, likely one of the most memorable books of the year. A heartbreaking and perfect examination of the death of Schulz's father and it‘s impact on her life (Lost), followed by being Found (part 2) by the love of her life, fellow author Casey Cep (Furious Hours). The final section “&” —a mingling of the worst and best times of Schulz‘s life. This is full of the stuff of life: joy and grief, death and love, the mundane and profound.

Chelsea.Poole @Megabooks I know you‘re not focusing on memoirs as much these days, but if you happen to feel an urge, this one is beautiful and definitely worth a try. 😊 3y
Lindy @Chelsea.Poole 💯agree! 3y
Megabooks Thanks for the recommendation!! 3y
See All 6 Comments
monalyisha @Chelsea.Poole Did you listen to this or read in print? Trying to decide which format to acquire! 2y
Chelsea.Poole @monalyisha I listened to the audio of this. Wonderful! 2y
monalyisha @Chelsea.Poole Perfect. 🖤 2y
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Becker
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

This was a lovely book. I will never look at the simple little ampersand the same way again. Very touching.👩‍❤️‍👩

Chelsea.Poole Lovely stained glass! ⛰ 3y
33 likes1 comment
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Kazzie
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
Pickpick

Really enjoyed this. Heard rather than read this book. It was such a good meditation on love and death

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Lindy
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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We wandered through a local contemporary art museum, which, because its exhibitions included towering stone megaliths and crumpled cars and piles of shattered glass, I jokingly described as the museum of fear-based art. I see your point, C said, looking up at a 9-foot tall spider by Louise Bourgeois.
(Internet photo)

TheLudicReader Um. No. 3y
Lindy @TheLudicReader Not a fan of giant spiders? 3y
TheLudicReader Or any 🕷. 3y
34 likes4 comments
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Lindy
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

A thoughtful memoir, unusual in the way its main focus is the author‘s emotional life… the emotions we all experience: grief, love, fear, joy, dread and wonder. The prose is gorgeous and precise, clear-eyed yet tender, whether writing about the death of her beloved father, Schulz‘s marriage to her wife, or musing more generally on the importance of connections. I loved the #audiobook which is narrated by the author. #LGBTQ

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Lindy
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Disappearance reminds us to notice, transience to cherish, fragility to defend. Loss is a kind of external conscience urging us to make better use of our finite days.

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Lindy
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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The cumulative effect of these various debilities was to make me feel tremendously old. Or maybe that‘s backwards. Maybe I incurred all those debilities because I already felt old. Grief of any kind will age you, partly from exhaustion, but chiefly from the confrontation with mortality.

KathyR I've read two of her "New Yorker" essays, one on her father's bookcase and another on how she proposed to her girlfriend. Both were lovely. I'm looking forward to checking out this book. 3y
Lindy @KathyR Schulz writes beautiful prose and the substance is there too. I really enjoyed her memoir. 3y
Suet624 I'm confused. This photo looks nothing like the photo in the back of her book. 2y
Lindy @Suet624 I added a more recent photo. Is that better? 😁 2y
Suet624 Oh wow. There she is! 2y
40 likes5 comments
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Lindy
Lost & Found: A Memoir | Kathryn Schulz
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Love is so often written about analogically—my love is like a red, red rose, etc—yet the point of the beloved, the whole reason you are in love with her, is that she is like no one else on earth.

ladym30 Beautiful!❤️ 3y
Lindy @ladym30 😊 3y
40 likes1 stack add2 comments
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Ellohcin
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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review
Well-ReadNeck
Lost and Found | Kathryn Schulz
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Pickpick

Absolutely loved this #audiobook narrated by the author that‘s partially a memoir about the death of the author‘s father and her falling in love with her partner. But, it‘s also about meteorites and etymology and losing your keys and so much more. 💕

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