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Sex at Dawn
Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships | Christopher Ryan, Cacilda Jetha
Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. Mainstream scienceas well as religious and cultural institutionshas maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing. Fewer and fewer couples are getting married, and divorce rates keep climbing as adultery and flagging libido drag down even seemingly solid marriages. How can reality be reconciled with the accepted narrative? It can't be, according to renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jeth. While debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, they offer a bold alternative explanation in this provocative and brilliant book. Ryan and Jeth's central contention is that human beings evolved in egalitarian groups that shared food, child care, and, often, sexual partners. Weaving together convergent, frequently overlooked evidence from anthropology, archaeology, primatology, anatomy, and psychosexuality, the authors show how far from human nature monogamy really is. Human beings everywhere and in every era have confronted the same familiar, intimate situations in surprisingly different ways. The authors expose the ancient roots of human sexuality while pointing toward a more optimistic future illuminated by our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity. With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jeth show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. They explore why long-term fidelity can be so difficult for so many; why sexual passion tends to fade even as love deepens; why many middle-aged men risk everything for transient affairs with younger women; why homosexuality persists in the face of standard evolutionary logic; and what the human body reveals about the prehistoric origins of modern sexuality. In the tradition of the best historical and scientific writing, Sex at Dawn unapologetically upends unwarranted assumptions and unfounded conclusions while offering a revolutionary understanding of why we live and love as we do.
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bill4earth
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Phenomenal book and intriguing read!

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ScoobySnacks3
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This book is a great 3 am insomnia read. Researchers make the case for polygamy. They use comparative primate studies and hunter gatherer data to argue that monogamy ISN‘T universal.

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ScoobySnacks3

Is it so very obvious that you can‘t love more than one person? We seem to manage it with parental love (parents are reproached if they don‘t at least pretend to love all their children equally), love of books, of food, of wine (love of Château Margaux does not preclude love of a fine Hock, and we don‘t feel unfaithful to the red when we dally with the white), love of composers, poets, holiday beaches, friends… Richard Dawkins

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Petelord
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A must read for anyone interested in sex. Great read and very funny

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Ekkross
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Fascinating and clearly well-researched. I enjoyed the way this book challenges notions of modern relationships and monogamy with humor supported by real observations and data.

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Ekkross
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An excellent piece of trivia.
Also, apparently, “hysteria” was still a real medical diagnosis until 1952. 🤦🏻‍♀️

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Maritzalpz29
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I was assigned this book by college professor, and although the chapters are condensed, it is very interesting. I found it enlightening if anything of how much we think we know and that we know nothing.

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keggergoldy
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Mehso-so

Ok, so I really enjoyed parts of this book and felt incredibly frustrated at others. It's very clear that this book was written with monogamous straight people in mind, and frankly that's just disappointing. I absolutely hated some of the rhetorical moves towards the end, but I found the overall point about evolutionary history compelling. Someone needs to write a queer version of this book and call it a day.

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keggergoldy
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There is a non-monogamy book on audible, so of course I had to try it out. So far it reads like a massive complaint against the prevailing assumptions in evolutionary psychology. What I like most (so far) is how the authors confront the lack of historical and social sensitivity that has mostly informed scholarship on the evolution of human sexuality.

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taning
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A must read. Most of us live in an unrealistic world, unfortunately. Even though this book makes sense, society is far from achieving anything like this.