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Toxic Positivity
Toxic Positivity: Keeping It Real in a World Obsessed with Being Happy | Whitney Goodman
29 posts | 5 read | 20 to read
A powerful guide to owning our emotionseven the difficult onesin order to show up authentically in the world, from the popular therapist behind the Instagram account @sitwithwhit. Every day, were bombarded with pressure to be positive. From good vibes only and life is good memes, to endless advice, to look on the bright side, were constantly told that the key to happiness is silencing negativity wherever it crops up, in ourselves and in others. Even when faced with illness, loss, breakups, and other challenges, theres little space for talking about our real feelingsand processing them so that we can feel better and move forward. But if all this positivity is the answer, why are so many of us anxious, depressed, and burned out? In this refreshingly honest guide, sought-after therapist Whitney Goodman shares the latest research along with everyday examples and client stories that reveal how damaging toxic positivity is to ourselves and our relationships, and presents simple ways to experience and work through difficult emotions. The result is more authenticity, connection, and growthand ultimately, a path to showing up as you truly are.
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rachelk
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Pickpick

“You didn‘t manifest everything bad in your life…” and furthermore the idea that you must be constantly pursuing happiness and staying positive can lead to anxiety and depression. Instead, Goodman advises us on how to be genuinely supportive of ourselves and others as we ditch toxic positivity for a more value driven life.

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keithmalek

In a happiness-driven life, we're focused on maintaining a good mood, seeking out only positive and happy experiences, and achieving happiness as the ultimate goal. A value-driven life allows you to prioritize what is important to you and find a path to get there. It makes room for the fact that living in accordance with our values doesn't always mean feeling happy or good, but it is in alignment with who we are and what we want.

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keithmalek
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This book started as a cri de couer against toxic positivity, but about halfway through, it mostly turned into a psychology book, which lessened my enjoyment of it. Also, the chapter "Discrimination With a Smile" was absurd. Over all, I would recommend this book, but readers who are interested in this topic would be better off reading "SHAM" by Steve Salerno, and "Brightsided" by Barbara Ehrenreich.

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Caroline2 👍 ❤️ 2y
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keithmalek

But here's the thing: emotions aren't intellectual. You can't think them away or deny them out of existence. Emotions don't always tell the truth and sometimes we interpret them incorrectly, but they're there for a reason. Telling yourself that you shouldn't be feeling something won't change that reality.

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Blueberry And leads to a big letdown when life doesn't go according to the plan. My therapist taught me the just-world fallacy 😊 2y
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keithmalek

Just be positive! If it were that easy or effective, we'd all be doing it. Allow yourself to experience what it means to be human-- the good and the bad.

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she.hearts.horror
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This is a helpful tool for anyone‘s toolkit. I really appreciated this timely read. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

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tjwill
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I feel like this book sums up my life pretty well right now. People are always saying to “look on the bright side” or that “things will get better” and that doesn‘t help when someone is going through difficult times. My coworkers are likely sick of me mentioning toxic positivity because I bring it up every time I notice it, which is a lot. I recommend to anyone who‘s been told to count their blessings whilst having a mental breakdown.

Maya.McClan I should read this. People that always want you to ”smile” drive me nuts. Just because I‘m not smiling doesn‘t mean I‘m being negative. Toxic positivity is real. 3y
Megabooks Excellent review! 3y
AmyG Nothing says support like “just smile”. 😳 I so get this. 3y
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tjwill @Maya.McClan Yes, same here! 3y
tjwill @Megabooks Thanks so much! 3y
tjwill @AmyG Yesssss, I hate that. 3y
53 likes1 stack add7 comments
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Megabooks
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I devoured this when it came out Tuesday. Goodman talks about how unrelenting positivity and “good vibes only” culture can hurt instead of help.

As a person with chronic health issues, I often want people to listen rather than offer positive platitudes. She talks about how to support people when they‘re dealing with ableism, racism, homophobia, and other situations and how to deal when you‘re the one facing problems. Great self help book!

Suet624 This post has me thinking back to how infuriating it is when people blah, blah, blah about making the best of a bad situation n 3y
Megabooks @Suet624 yes! So often I just want people to listen and say supportive, “I understand why this is difficult for you,” as opposed to advice and platitudes. I loved her ways of deepening the support as well. 3y
Centique I agree with you on this wholeheartedly! A must read for me then #stacked 3y
Megabooks @Centique enjoy! She had some really good recommendations. 3y
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mdemanatee
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Just noticed that libro.fm updated from track lists to the chapter names (double-checked with a romance I‘m also in the middle of). This was basically my one critique from when trying to flip between audio and print on some titles and I am thrilled.

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mdemanatee
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Planning to audio binge this new release today (have no experience with author‘s work am just glad to see this topic having more resources)

Megabooks I‘m about to finish. Gobbled it up today! 3y
mdemanatee @Megabooks I‘m behind. Ended up actually having to use more brain power than I was anticipating today (😂) but I am loving it so far. 3y
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